meeting Baby T for the first time in Ethiopia
After flying for over 22 hours on three different flights, Hubby and I returned home Saturday night changed forever. The last time I posted for all of you, I didn’t know if we were going to be able to get a court date for Baby T. Well, we did get a court date and we passed! 🙂 The entire time we were in Ethiopia, we were told that our agencies’ lawyer would do what he could to secure us a court date. He told us he would do his best and that he thought he would get us one. However, we were not given an official court date until the very last minute on Thursday. We were given a court date and time of Friday at 1:30. We left Ethiopia Friday night so our court date was really cutting it close! But we passed and per Ethiopia, we are Baby T’s legal guardians. After passing court, we went back to spend time with Baby T one more time and then had to leave for the airport.
Each day last week, our driver would bring us (and two other adoptive families) to the foster home to see our children. We went every morning from 10 am – 12 pm and then again in the afternoon from 3 pm – 5 pm. It was amazing to watch the other children bond with their parents more and more as time went by. And personally, to watch Baby T really come out of his shell during the 10 visits we had with him was amazing. Our last 4 visits with him, I was actually able to get him to fall asleep in my arms. For many of you, I know that is not a big deal. But for a child who only knows institutionalized care, this is really huge. Baby T is not used to being rocked to sleep. He is used to self soothing and basically falling asleep by himself. So with us, when he got tired, he would totally fight his fatigue. The first couple of days, we just enjoyed playing with him. The last couple of days, however, I tried rocking him to sleep once his eyes got heavy. It took lots of work, lots and lots of rocking and lots of patience. But eventually, he would succumb to sleep and it was such an amazing feeling to watch him lying there sleeping in my arms.
Every time we went to see Baby T, we were brought to a small, one room trailer like room. It was painted green on the inside (as you can see in the pic above). The room was spacious enough to fit three families and their kiddos. But it has no amenities like heat or even a bathroom. One of the things that surprised me about Ethiopia is that it is actually colder there than I expected. Every afternoon it would rain and along with the rain came a bitter cold that would chill you to the bones. That bitter cold would seep into the room that we sat in with Baby T. Almost all of the children in the foster home have colds. The foster home has 55 kids housed in just 4 (yes four) rooms thus spreading germs like wildfires. The bitter cold brings illnesses as well. Baby T has a cold. In fact, I’m home sick with the cold and cough I got from him. We met with the doctor at the foster home who did prescribe a medication for him, but I’m still worried. The cough is in his chest. That is not necessarily a big deal here in the states. But in Ethiopia, with their limited medical care and resources, it is an even bigger deal. Rainy season in Ethiopia begins in July and goes through early fall. We are hoping we can bring Baby T home before it gets much colder or damper in Ethiopia.
Last week we watched two other families pass court and then say good-bye to their boys as they had one last meeting with them before they left Ethiopia for their homes in the states. It was painful to watch their good-byes. Especially when we watched one family say good-bye to their 4 and 6 year old boys. The 6 year old fully understood what was going on and the grief on his face made everyone break down who was watching. For hubby and I, it was perhaps easier because Baby T doesn’t realize what is/was going on. But on the other hand, it was equally as painful because we are leaving him behind and can not bring him home. And while the staff at the foster home is loving and caring, I know that the care that we can give Baby T would be 100% better. And to have seen him make such progress bonding to us during the 20 hours we spent with him last week and to then have to leave… just heartbreaking.
Our next step that we need to complete is that we need to clear Embassy. With court, Ethiopia deems us guardians of Baby T. With Embassy, the U.S. says we can bring Baby T home to the states. Ethiopia is wrought with adoption fraud. (As is most third-world countries that allow International adoption AND as are some domestic adoptions. If you haven’t followed our adoption journey, feel free to read more on our adoption blog HERE as we talk about our journey and heartbreaks with International and domestic adoptions.) So investigations by the Embassy are a necessary evil to confirm that each orphan is in fact an orphan. I get that. In fact, I’ve spent countless hours (more like hundreds – literally) researching the ins and outs of Ethiopian adoptions. But the problem is that through this time of investigations, Baby T will remain in an orphanage where he is not getting the care he needs. Institutionalized care is not the same as the care he would receive with a loving family. So we are waiting and hoping that we will clear Embassy quickly. On average, Embassy is between 6-8 weeks. However, it could be shorter.. or it could be much longer. I will keep you posted on our progress.
A huge thank you to my team of gals who kept Addicted to Saving up and running this past week. I had limited internet access (in fact, two days, the guest house we stayed at had no power, let alone internet!). My gals kept all of you up-to-date on deals while I was gallivanting in Ethiopia with my hubby and Baby T. I am so thankful for them!
To see older posts I have written about our adoption on Addicted to Saving, go HERE.
Thanks for coming to Addicted to Saving! Here’s a little bit about me so you can know who’s behind all these posts!
My name is Liza and I began my money-saving journey in the Spring of 2009 as a way to stretch a limited household income. I had lost my job and my hubby was self-employed. I launched Addicted to Saving in November of 2009 and it has grown by leaps and bounds. Since then, my hubby and I have struggled with the ups and downs of two failed adoptions and are now LOVING being parents to our little man Asher who we brought home from Ethiopia in August of 2013. I feel incredibly blessed to be able to help you save money. My goal is that you will have FUN and become empowered to save more and more money each week..
You will have your son home soon and he will be in your arms or ever. He is adorable! I will say prayers to have your family together as soon as possible. Keep the faith that all will go smoothly. God is good!
Thank you so much for your continued prayers! God is good!
You are glowing in the photos with Baby T. He is beautiful. Prayers and wishes that the embassy moves quickly in your favor.
Thank you for sharing your growing family with us. Baby T is beautiful, truly a gift from God that I hope it is your forever arms so soon!!!! Praying for quickness with the Embassy, I cannot imagine leaving your son, whom you have grown to love so much. Praying for your peace as your wait. Also, praying for God to pour true healing into his little body!
so glad everything went well I will keep you all in my thoughts and well wishes. He’s Adorable!
So very happy for you all and Baby T!
I no longer coupon, but I always check your site to see how the adoption process is going. When I logged on last week to see you traveled to Africa I was over the moon. To log in this morning to see a picture of you holding baby T (adorable BTW) I’m just simply speechless. What can you say? May everything go smoothly and rapidly for you.
Congratulations on such a successful trip–the baby is adorable. I will pray for you and your family that all goes well and quickly.
J.
I read your story and my eyes welled up wit years of joy and happiness for all you!! Baby T is soooo handsome and you guys look like a perfect family. Thanks for updating us.
This is wonderful! I am so happy for you all. Prayers for all of you and all in the home.
Praying he is home with you soon.
Your article has brought tears of joy to my eyes. I pray that you are able to bring your baby home soon and that he is healthy and thrives. He is absolutely adorable.
I can’t wait to hear that you are bringing him home. You are wonderful people adopting this child. I know that you will love him and take wonderful care of him. God bless the three of you.
Such a beautiful family! We are all excited for you!! Prayers that this all falls into place sooner than later.
He is a beautiful baby!! It warmed my heart to read your story. Our prayer group prayed for you and God answered prayer. We will continue to lift you up in prayer for that little boy to be in your home very soon.
Thank you so much for the prayers Judy! Please keep them coming 🙂 We have one more hurdle (embassy) and then we can bring him home!
What a precious boy! I’m thrilled for you and your entire family.
Baby T is so adorable Liza!
Thank you Candace!
He is adorable Liza, thank you so much for posting this. I don’t think this made it onto your addicted to adoption site. I just found this post scrolling here, but I was determined to see what your results were from your trip. Prayers for quick embassy results and then Baby T can come home?
WONDERFUL! CONGRATS :-)!!! I pray that you all are always happy, healhty and blessed!
International Adoption is very difficult, it will allow you to love your little guy even more!!!! I think Americans like myself take our healthy children for granted just like it’s supposed to just be that way…. I have 3 friends who have done international adoption, it can be done and you will succeed, Baby T needs you both! as you need him…. The Lord will be with him now and until he is safe at home with you both! God Bless, life is a journey, especially if we live outside ourselves, I always say my heart is on each of my arms now that I have two children, and people attack my heart and it hurts, but God is soo good and life goes on through the heartaches.
Thank you for lettng us know how the adoption is going. We are all excited for you. What an adorable baby. Praying for you all
Thanks for sharing your story. It brought tears to my eyes. I am an adoptive mom and although my journey was different – I understand the feelings. Good luck and I will keep you in my prayers for a quick reunification with Baby T.
Thank you for your prayers and encouragement Marisol! The journey may be different for you and I, but I am thinking our emotions and fears were/are very similar. Thank you again.